The other morning I woke up and had the clearest picture of my life as shards of broken glass, a mirror of my life, lying in pieces on the floor, glinting in the sun. Some of the pieces catch my eye, enticing me to look.
I pick up a shimmering shard and in it I see myself; younger, laughing and happy, playing with my young children. I pick up another; me, nearly 10 years ago, sitting alone, staring into nothingness, looking empty and disappointed. I pick up yet another; I'm even younger still, dancing at a club with my boyfriend from college, laughing, having fun, feeling incredibly sexy as he puts his hands on my hips, swaying with me and letting me know how much he loves the way I move.
In the next piece I pick up I'm sitting, relaxing and having a glass of wine or two with a man I dated a few years back. I see us talking, sitting on the couch, near the fireplace. He gives me that look then gently kisses me on the mouth, he takes my glass of wine, sets it on the table, and pulls me to him. He tells me he doesn't know what it is, but that there is just something really sexy about me. I'm smiling.
Another shard and I'm sitting at the computer, looking at the hundreds of pictures of other naked women that my husband has been entertaining himself with. Tears roll down my face. How can I ever compete with that? I look sad, thinking about how he never touches me.
I pick up a final shard. Its me looking at a phone bill realizing my husband has been communicating with another woman. I see my face clearly, as I look up at myself, sadness and a feeling of emptiness radiate from the shard of glass as it slides out of my hand to the floor and breaks into a million little pieces.
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